Am I too fixated?
As I’ve aged I’ve noticed that I tend to get fixated on particularly significant parts of my life. (My husband is great at pointing things out that I never noticed about myself.) In the past I’ve intensely focused on relationships, jobs, projects, hobbies, etc. I once stayed up for over 12 hours working on an art project and forgot to eat or use the bathroom. I clearly remember the pain in my eyes, but I just couldn’t stop.
I’ve been asking myself lately if my tendency toward fixation is beneficial or detrimental. My current fixation is building a small business and its corresponding website. If you haven’t tried either, I recommend both. It’s always cool to see the guts that make things tick. I titled my blog site Natural Connections because no matter what I am prioritizing (aka fixating on), I find ways to help my current interest enrich all other areas of my life and my view of the world.
I’m leaning toward the idea that fixation isn’t necessarily a bad thing. Sometimes it’s the drive that I need to be the wonderfully motivated person that I am. Sometimes it’s the intense fascination about something that makes me dig deeper and stare longer to see the details I would have otherwise missed. For example, my bike rides take forever because I have to stop frequently to look at birds through my binoculars and try to capture some cool shots on my camera. Even taking breaks to listen to the wind blow is incredibly intoxicating and refreshing.
I have to be careful to find a balance. I love nature, caring for our earth, enriching my fellow citizens lives, reading, laughing, creating, working, spending time with children, and the list goes on! If I find that other areas of my life are suffering, I must step back and look at my big picture.
Here is what I look for in myself to determine if I need to retreat and examine the broader view:
- Am I losing sleep because my brain won’t stop thinking about that one thing?
- Is the majority of my conversation with others only about my current fixation?
- Do I make excuses to avoid making plans so I can work on my project instead?
- Am I dreading doing other things because I can’t let go and take breaks?
- Am I listening to others when they try to help me out and encourage me to step back and chill out? Or do I find myself responding defensively and justifying my fixation? I’ve learned that the words of my closest friends need to be taken seriously because they are said in love!
- Am I setting time aside to meditate and reset myself in the knowledge that I’m a part of a beautiful network that is much bigger than me, myself and I?
Sometimes it feels like time freezes as I dedicate myself to reaching a goal, but I must always remember to look up often on my journey so I don’t miss the beauty that surrounds me!